Friday 20 September 2013

Metal, Cabbage and Meat!!!!

I`m driving home from work, thinking about that stupid mead video that Haffy posted a few weeks back. I`m so pissed off I feed two Slayer albums into my CD-player simultaneously just to keep my blood from boiling. Seasons in the Abyss and South of Heaven. Damn Lombardo is blasting like a motherf..cker. How can I top this damn mead movie. I haven`t written anything good in a long time. Just working, sleeping and occasionally drinking good beer..... in between working and sleeping. I`m hungry and it does no good either for my driving or anger management, flipping off pedestrians left and right and shouting at the driver in front of me for not keeping up with my current driving standards. I need food to calm down, but not anything quick, fried or smeared in industrial grease. I need something proper and majestic. Something that could be mistaken for beeing polish, but is truly true norwegian old school style. Something Slayer would eat after a gig while touring through central Congo and Sierra Leone. Meat. I need meat. I need metal, cabbage and meat!!!!

I rush down to my local butcher, Idsøe (dating back to 1828), and pick up some nice pieces of shoulder of lamb. Its in season, and Slayer are sharpening their axes. After getting some nice cabbage from my next door grocery shop I slice it with brutal efficiency and lethal precision on my kitchen bench. Chop chop you dead. I get a big pot, throw it at the neighbours car, get a new and bigger pot,and start prepping. Sliced cabbage, lamb, sea salt and whole pepper corns, and then repeat infinitely. Instead of water, I pour some Chimay Red and Vanderghinste Oud Bruin from Bockor, making a fruity, malty and a little sourish stock for the meat and cabbage to soak in for about 90 minutes at close to boiling temperatures with the lid on. POW! SMASH!! BLOINGH! CRASH!!     IT`S ALIIIIIIVE!!!....*

(Fårikål is Norway's national dish)

Behold. I have created an awesome dish. Salty, peppery, malty, cabbagey, meaty yumminess. Easy to make, cheap and perfect for those early autumn mosh pits.

I devour it accompanied with a nice glass of Baladin Birra Lurisia Sei. Life is good, and suddenly that mead video is not so bad after all.

( The recipe was inspired by my fellow beer blogger colleague, beer enthusiast and bringer of great Italian beers, Jørn Idar Almås Kvig of Beer Enthusiast/ Høyt Skum)

Cheers from Kjetil

Hannibal Lecter: And what did you see, Clarice? What did you see?
Clarice Starling: Lambs. The lambs were screaming.
Hannibal Lecter: They were slaughtering the spring lambs?
Clarice Starling: And they were screaming.


  1. Nok en gang god lesning. Bloggen deres begynner å bli min favoritt om dagen. Dessuten fikk artikkelen meg til å sette Slayer i spilleren her, deilig med ordentlig musikk en fredag.

  2. Oh, soured fårikål? Talking about stepping it up!

  3. I gryta mi putrer det nå fårikål con Betty Brown!

  4. Høres spennende ut. Neste gang blir det nok å marinere både kjøttet og kålen i Boon Oude Geuze

  5. Fåribettybrownkål var vellykka, selv om jeg må innrømma at jeg juksa litt: det bare var ett kjøttstykke og litt kål som fikk koke i Betty Brown i 45 minutter, etter først å ha kost seg sammen med resten av kjøttet og kålen i hovedgryta i over tre timer (ja, jeg liker fårikålen min godt kokt!). Det er også mulig at Betty Brown er i overkant humlete til å koke så lenge, kanskje en daffere variant av brown ale, f.eks. Newcastle, hadde vært vel så bra. Jeg er ikke helt sikker på om fårisurkål er min greie...